Thread: Religion a la carte

Taoism: Shit happens
Hinduism: This shit happened before
Buddhism: It is only the illusion of shit happening
Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?
Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah
Jehovah's Witness: Knock, knock, shit happens
Atheism: There is no such thing as shit
Agnosticism: Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn't
Protestantism: Shit won't happen if I work harder
Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it
Judaism: Why does shit always happen to me
Televangelism: Send money or shit will happen to you
Rastafarianism: Smoke that shit
Unitarianism: Who gives a shit?

There you have it folks. I thought about adding one for Mormonism, but all I could think of it's "Oops, I just made shit happen in my magic underwear" and that would be rude. So never mind.

Yours was the funniest Blue.

Or, "If shit happened then it damn well happened in America", for Mormonism

HaHaHa...Good one!

Palestinian: We have no where for shit to happen.

I know it isn't a religion or philosophy but I thought it fit.

Quality! PMSL

Mormonism: Shit happens because Joseph Smith said it does or
Mormonism: Can't marry that shit because its not in the plural